Tag: libertarian

Then he swiped his credit card to pay me for arresting him

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police

I was shooting heroin

and reading “The Fountainhead”

in the front seat of my privately owned police cruiser

when a call came in.

I put a quarter in the radio to activate it. It was the chief.

“Bad news, detective. We got a situation.”

“What? Is the mayor trying to ban trans fats again?”

“Worse. Somebody just stole four hundred and forty-seven million dollars’ worth of bitcoins.”

The heroin needle practically fell out of my arm. “What kind of monster would do something like that? Bitcoins are the ultimate currency: virtual, anonymous, stateless. They represent true economic freedom, not subject to arbitrary manipulation by any government. Do we have any leads?”

“Not yet. But mark my words: we’re going to figure out who did this and we’re going to take them down … provided someone pays us a fair market rate to do so.”

“Easy, chief,” I said. “Any rate the market offers is, by definition, fair.”

He laughed. “That’s why you’re the best I got, Lisowski. Now you get out there and find those bitcoins.”

“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’m on it.”

I put a quarter in the siren. Ten minutes later, I was on the scene. It was a normal office building, strangled on all sides by public sidewalks. I hopped over them and went inside.

“Home Depot™ Presents the Police!®” I said, flashing my badge and my gun and a small picture of Ron Paul. “Nobody move unless you want to!” They didn’t.

“Now, which one of you punks is going to pay me to investigate this crime?” No one spoke up.

“Come on,” I said. “Don’t you all understand that the protection of private property is the foundation of all personal liberty?”

It didn’t seem like they did.

“Seriously, guys. Without a strong economic motivator, I’m just going to stand here and not solve this case. Cash is fine, but I prefer being paid in gold bullion or autographed Penn Jillette posters.”

Nothing. These people were stonewalling me. It almost seemed like they didn’t care that a fortune in computer money invented to buy drugs was missing.

I figured I could wait them out. I lit several cigarettes indoors. A pregnant lady coughed, and I told her that secondhand smoke is a myth. Just then, a man in glasses made a break for it.

“Subway™ Eat Fresh and Freeze, Scumbag!®” I yelled.

Too late. He was already out the front door. I went after him.

“Stop right there!” I yelled as I ran. He was faster than me because I always try to avoid stepping on public sidewalks. Our country needs a private-sidewalk voucher system, but, thanks to the incestuous interplay between our corrupt federal government and the public-sidewalk lobby, it will never happen.

I was losing him. “Listen, I’ll pay you to stop!” I yelled. “What would you consider an appropriate price point for stopping? I’ll offer you a thirteenth of an ounce of gold and a gently worn ‘Bob Barr ‘08’ extra-large long-sleeved men’s T-shirt!”

He turned. In his hand was a revolver that the Constitution said he had every right to own. He fired at me and missed. I pulled my own gun, put a quarter in it, and fired back. The bullet lodged in a U.S.P.S. mailbox less than a foot from his head. I shot the mailbox again, on purpose.

“All right, all right!” the man yelled, throwing down his weapon. “I give up, cop! I confess: I took the bitcoins.”

“Why’d you do it?” I asked, as I slapped a pair of Oikos™ Greek Yogurt Presents Handcuffs® on the guy.

“Because I was afraid.”

“Afraid?”

“Afraid of an economic future free from the pernicious meddling of central bankers,” he said. “I’m a central banker.”

I wanted to coldcock the guy. Years ago, a central banker killed my partner. Instead, I shook my head.

“Let this be a message to all your central-banker friends out on the street,” I said. “No matter how many bitcoins you steal, you’ll never take away the dream of an open society based on the principles of personal and economic freedom.”

He nodded, because he knew I was right. Then he swiped his credit card to pay me for arresting him.

Selling your days to the highest bidder

AraLeave a comment

celebrity auction

When I can’t lead myself, I seek support.

From leaders, like a boss, a captain, or a mentor in my field. Or I seek support from others, like a partner, or family member. Or it can be the simple support  of a schedule, in a job, or the regiment of the military. Maybe it’s the organization in a sports team, or even a political group.

Whichever it is, the support is necessary, even critical.

These supports help us set goals and the procedure to get to them. But choosing the purpose of those goals is up to me. Why are those goals important to me? Which organization will I choose? Should I work for company A or B? Should I be a creator or an administrator?

And so one of the great struggles of the human continues:

Choose what you want as an individual, while wanting to be an accepted member of the group.

In this delicate balance, we choose the place to spend our life..to sell our life. Each day of work is a day of my life I have sold to the highest bidder. Not just for money, of course, but the place where I will get the greatest reward: The reward of knowing what I’m doing is producing something important.

Knowing your importance is critical, because anything else we have in life is only a substitute we may use to get through the days of our lives, but not the reason for living.

Can we just let Dad drive?

AraLeave a comment

Russell Brand

(2 min 30 seconds to read)

I used to laugh off the extremists. Those on the fringe left who discourage offensive language, encourage patience with repressive Islamists, and promote a US conspiracy as the cause for the Muslims fighting each other .

I used to laugh off the birthers who criticized everything Obama did, as if he was any less authoritarian than George W. Bush. I used to dismiss those who thought the country was going socialist, while they ignored the fact that we all have our social security cards and the government was subsidizing big industries, from agriculture to oil to our banking system.

Then I really laughed at those who reacted to these dramatists on the fringe. The reactionaries on twitter and youtube who amplified and contested every emotional outburst  from social justice warrior and libertarian alike, whether the post deserved attention or not.

The 24 hours news cycle that needed to be filled by CNN and FOX and other big media networks was no longer.  You and me, our posts, podcasts, and tweets, were filling it now, with our feelings saturating the digital space.

And so now I wonder who out there doesn’t have a camp. Is there anyone left who won’t outright dismiss a statement coming from “the other side”? Have we become so emotionally charged, so easily led, that we cannot be allowed to have meaningful influence of government?

I was most sympathetic to libertarianism, because I think that large institutions are prone to soul-crushing and domineering, whether the institution is governmental or corporate. I put more trust in people. I value people’s freedom, not the institution’s. I believed the best change, the most meaningful change, came from the bottom up, not the top down.

I wanted to empower the people. But not so much anymore.

I wonder if it’s better to accept the liberal elitism which favors disempowering the population, in order to keep us from hurting ourselves.

“Son, I know you’re 18 years old, but let me have the keys. I’ll drive you wherever you need. It’s easier and safer for everyone.”

Maybe we do need a paternal government which limits our options and controls our economy, our paychecks, and our lifestyles.

Because from what I see, so many of us are thinking with our heart, or from our gut, but we’re not thinking about issues with our minds.

Follow me and I will take you away from the everyday.

Please feel free to pass this along if you think others would enjoy it.

Observation is good. Sharing is better.

 

Your strength is needed. Now…more than ever.

AraLeave a comment

Some people think they know better than others. You know the type. They give advice on everything. They believe they have the system of do’s and don’ts that will work. They want what is best for you. And they believe they know what the best thing for you to do is. In fact, they think they know what is best for everyone.

Others believe it’s better for people to make their own choice. They believe people will strive, work, share, and care for others. Not because we’re forced to, but because in a stable system of laws, that is what we will do. They believe people should have the freedom to live how they want, but without hurting others. To choose what passion to follow, where to work, how much to pay, how much to get paid, what to buy, how to explore their own consciousness, and who to congregate with.

There are those who want a system of control because they want to protect people, not just from others, but protect them from making the wrong choices. They want to protect us from ourselves. They are cautious of people. Do they even trust people?

They like giving guidelines, and providing a program. They believe in a high standard of living, and they want everyone to have that standard, not just the opportunity for that standard, because they think everyone deserves it. And they will engineer a system using their formula of mandates that will get you this, regardless of how this effects the financial condition of the country. They will make it too affordable to pass up or they will cook it into the system so you have no choice.

These people truly want to help others.

And they believe they are the expert authority on that. And they believe in a central authority. Like a central bank that controls money, or a central insurance company that controls health care, or a central department of energy and agriculture to provide corporate welfare. Or a police authority that has taken our right to trial, so we can be arrested without charge.

Those who believe in people are different. They are courageous, because living an empowered life is damn scary. But that is why we are here. Not to make a perfect world, but to accept that life is not going to be perfect, and anything that is worth doing in life is risky. And caring about someone else is not about giving them something. It’s about being their friend and helping them face to face, not through a check delivered by a service taken from our paycheck.

We’re here to make choices, not have someone else make them for us.

We’re here to get hurt, mend, learn, and grow. And when we see someone else hurting, we’re here to extend our own hand and help them up. Not pay others to help them for us. Because people need to intimately know they are valued before they can do something of value. And because you cannot make someone care about you by forcing them to share with you.

We’re here to explore our passions and our own consciousness without being restricted on what we can do, unless it hurts another person.

We know that we cannot get as far alone as we can by joining others, but not in faceless networks. We’re here to share life in a community, because we must have the opportunity to learn that without guidelines or incentives, a rich life is one of honest collaboration with others.

We know that if we give leaders the authority to do things on behalf of us, we must remain aware of how they are using this power. And that we must stop them when we feel they are doing a disservice to us.

We know that we should treat everyone else how we would want to be treated. And so we act accordingly.

These people trust humanity to do the right thing.

Some might call these libertarian values.

But they are not.

They are called human values.

And I believe it is how we should live.