This here’s a tale for all the fellas. So ladies, you can stop reading now.
All us men do…to some degree or another. Except for gay boys. And that’s fine. I should’ve told you gay boys to stop reading, too, but, anyway…I’m talking about straight guys. We’re not better, we just are who we are. And what we are is lovers of women. Very obvious, I know. But not so obvious to women…and why?Because we don’t act like it.I mean, we act like it when we talk with other guys, “Did you see her?”…Or when we stare at her as if sizing up a chunk of beef. But why don’t we show it to our women?
We’ve become insulated in, and at the same time, alienated from, our manhood.
And in the process, we’ve forgotten about her.
It’s time we realize that our manhood is something to be proud of. It’s something to be shared. It’s always there, wanting to be expressed, needing to be expressed. Sometimes hidden behind all the other obstacles to our true nature, but it’s there.
The male drive is divinely given, from somewhere beyond our recognition and beyond our control (Just see how hundreds of years of trying to control it turned out with Catholic priests.)
The first step in understanding our relationship to women is accepting we have no control over our desires for women. No more control than anyone that gets hungry when they pass a restaurant that’s cooking up food.
Accept it. We are helpless for women. Mark Manson, in the opening of his book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, explains the underlying method to expressing yourself:
We love women. Stop trying to love women and love them. It’s that simple. The outcome of expressing our love is unavoidable, so stop worrying about it. Stop trying to be anything but your loving self.
Don’t think about it, because it makes no logical sense. There’s her beautiful smile, flashing eyes, round breasts, smooth legs…and all of us are triggered.
There is shame in our love when there need not be. Shame in wanting to be in the presence of those lyrical voices, to engage those energetic spirits, to bend her waist and to touch her hips.
But what they deserve from us they seldom get. They need our appreciative smile, our genuine compliments, the invitation to come with us and not worry because they see a confident guy who knows what he wants.
The male religion is not one of male dominance or manipulation or dishonesty. It is one of helpless, shameless attraction to females. And expressing this is what makes us whole, it is what gives our lives meaning.
Without recognizing our place, standing across from our females, in coupled connection, we are denying ourselves our birthright. And shamefully, we are denying the females the experience of a man who loves them.