Do you lean more towards empowering individuals?

Or more towards empowering the institutions?

More simply, do often find yourself in the group that wants to be left alone to build your home and community?

Or do you find yourself in the group that won’t leave others alone, and wants the institution to build your community for you?

Through church authorities or government authorities:  Forced communion is not as meaningful as independent communion.

Voting is good.

Participation in your community is better.

I was envious of his car, a BMW, a beautifully made vehicle.  And his big house, with all the life options it offered.  And his career, working a lot, but earning a lot.  He had no real troubles.  He took his kids to football and dance practice.   I could see he was happy.  But how could I know?

Success on the outside doesn’t mean success on the inside.  I had no idea what was going on inside his head.  Then I found out he suffered from depression. And insecurity. Impossible, right?  But, it was happening.  And then I heard he got a divorce.  A devastating thing to go through, splitting from your partner.

And yet….

We’ve all got it pretty good.  At least, in the First World, but even in Africa.  For the average person, it’s the best it’s ever been in the history of humankind.  Worried about being robbed by bandits? Not so much anymore.  Losing half your children in childbirth? Not really.

Lifespan, up;  General health: up. Incidence of assault and robbery: down.  Females CEOs: going up every year in the US.  Black and brown minorities fill our judge seats, academic faculties, and medical professions. We even elected a black person as president after a history of slavery.

But that doesn’t mean injustice and wrongs don’t happen. We are human after all, with immorality and prejudging seeded in each of us.  After appreciating the good life, we can still make our community a better place by helping each other, by taking responsibility for being a good neighbor.

Gratitude and love are still the most critical parts of human life. That has not changed. What has changed is your environment.  It is a much safer place, and more fruitful than it has ever been.

Yes, the kings and moneyed class still control more than you.  But they’re not more happy than you.

Choose your own game.

Because we don’t need the kings anymore.

Photo credit: Aubrey Marcus podcast

Make yourself vulnerable, take the risks, ask questions.

How else do you experience the world?

Safely, in a constructed home,  a little neighborhood, comfortable with preconceived notions and those who agree with you.

The choice: Whether to be adventurous and risk going out at night, off the trail where the thorns may be (will probably be), and find out what you’re made of.

Or don’t.

The righteous don’t need to respect you.

Narcissists don’t need to respect you.

But they should.

Why?  Because no one is all the time right.

But being disrespected is allowed in some instances.  Like when children disrespect you. Because they’re children, you let it go.  They haven’t formed a stable sense of self, a confidence in themselves.  So they don’t listen so much, and they go by their heart and their feelings.  They stomp their feet, they scream and shout.

But we let children be.  Because they are children, and they will mature.

As for the adults?

There’s nothing you can do for them.  Their cake is baked.  Their personalities formed. Their triggers set.

Best to let them be.  And hope they don’t damage your community, or your country, too much, so that we can fix it later.

If your expectation is to always win, you will live with heartache. Because you’re living in a fantasy world.

But not trying has cost as well. And that is the cost of regret.

Failure is the cost of trying. Failures are always the cost of trying.

And the expectation of failure is what gets you macro-wins.

Thanks to Gary Vee for the help on verbiage.

“Every system is improved when it’s in sync, and the narcissism of small differences is a seduction that keeps us from focusing on creating real value by doing important work.

Realizing that things can get better (they can always get better) opens the door for productive conversations, conversations that aren’t based on prior decisions about what team someone is on, and instead, on putting our shoulder to the work, taking responsibility and actually making things better. We can fight injustice without becoming pawns in a boxing promoter’s game.” 

Let’s get in sync and not allow the politics of division to control us by tempting our narcissism of being better than the others.

Immigrants and China aren’t going to compromise America. But we should have standards about monitoring who is allowed into this country or how other nations treat us in trade relations. 

White patriarchy isn’t responsible for keeping others down. But the white patriarchy could be more helpful to  those who need help. And more importantly, to those who want help. 

Forget your “team”. Left, right, Democrat, Republican. 

There is no us and them. Thinking this way divides America. And destroys our communities. We each have a responsibility to be the best we can be. For each other. And most importantly for yourself.

When criticism is my only work, then I’m doing it wrong.

Where is the work that shows my real value?

What am I actually doing?

What are you doing? 

Quote credit: Seth Godin

Anxiety is sacrificing the real you to protect yourself from dangers that may not exist.

Go lightly 

so you may see clearly , without the intoxication of emotion.

Remain focused on the true value the world provides,

And the service you can provide the world.

Instead of reacting in hate, which is destructive and tears others down, provide something that builds others up. 

 The end doesn’t justify the means

Even if my moral convictions are more heartfelt than the opposition.