Should California residents be required to shut off the water during their soaping sessions to conserve water, and need there be an Office of Water Use monitoring this? And should there be Water Credits given to each household, which can be traded with other citizens, for those who need longer showers because they still want to live like an American or perhaps for the truly filthy?

And should there be exemptions for women, who need to wash their long hair, and what would the minimum hair length be? or if they wanted to take baths instead, specifically bubble baths, and should there be regulation of this by a Bubble Bath crew.

BAM BAM, “Surprise inspection! How long is your hair, Miss? Don’t touch your hair please, just stand up so we can measure. Don’t worry, we’re professionals, this will only take a second. Hey, Joe, where’s the hair metric scanning recorder? What? Oh, we don’t have one? None in the truck? No biggie, we’ll have another brought over from another crew. Til then we’ll have a seat and wait. What’s that you’re reading there? Cosmo, huh? Well, don’t mind us, we’ll just have a smoke here. It’s medicinal, don’t worry. We all have bad backs from doing this job. State jobs, you know, they can get rough. Wow, that’s a big tub. How many people you think we can get in there?”