Archive for the ‘change’ Category
Why avoiding heaven should be at the top of your 2013 to-do list
Filed under: change, discovery, empowerment, friendship, God, Independence, Religion, Uncategorized | Tags: 2013, easy life, eliminate desire, hard choices, heaven, human nature, new year's resolutions, perfection, Value of work
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Heaven is perfect. Everything to be understood is already understood. Any choices we make don’t change our happiness. We’re perfect. We have nothing to strive for. There is nothing more to know. A constant state stretching into infinity.
Heaven, perhaps not coincidentally, sounds like death.
Your actions are insignificant since everything will turn out as it should. During death, you become disordered into the system. But in heaven, everything is ordered. And since there is no disorder to shy from, the order is meaningless. And if there are any changes in heaven, they become meaningless, too.
This is why we must make choices with positive or negative consequences.
To have significance, our existence must include taking risks. There must be a negative outcome to suffer, so that there is a positive state for us to value. We must have a little suffering, a little wanting, a little desire, to make life worth living, actions worth taking, love worth making, and friendships worth building, because…
No desire means no love
The argument for a heavenly state is that we need to be content…we need to have gratitude with what IS before looking to what more can be. Desire leads only to more desire, unless checked by gratitude. Gratitude gives us peace. It keeps us grounded. It allows acceptance of what is, so our identity does not become wrapped up in what we do. Our selves always come before our job, or home, or looks, or our friends. If those things are stripped away, our gratitude for our humanity, for just having the dumb luck to be born, to exist, this profound truth will sustain us.
Gratitude allows us to value life. And valuing life itself gives us the reasoning for how we will use this life. Why we do something is as important as what we do.
But a heavenly gratitude without the passion to act is a divine lobotomy, stretching timelessly into oblivion
Human nature ties us all together. After we recognize that we all grow angry, fearful, happy, anxious, peaceful, lustful, needy… then we…then we can decide how to act. Will I be driven by my insecurity? Or by purpose and confidence and love?
As much as our natures are alike, our behavior differentiates us. Yes, we are all special, but only because of our behavior.
Our behavior makes us who we are
Our behaviors are based on our decisions, and we decide based on costs. Costs of how much we want to suffer, how much we want to risk losing something for what we love…Do we shoot for the love…or not?
Heaven is perfect. But that just isn’t good enough
So, don’t lose that desire. Carry heaven in your mind, but realize there’s more to you than the passive contentment behind those pearly gates.
To a new year of risk. To days that end with a resounding “hell yes!” or with a little fear because you don’t know what’s going to happen. And ultimately…doing what you love.
Cheers to 2013, friends.
How to be a superhero
Filed under: Accountability, change, empowerment | Tags: Avengers, best part of the avengers, don't kneel, empowerment, Loki
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I just saw the movie, The Avengers. It was a disappointment to me, but this scene was so different from the rest of the movie. Really, I felt it to be the best part. It delved into defining humanity…a quest that men have faced since men became men. Do we lead, or do we follow?
In the video, Loki tells everyone to kneel and follow, because he believes himself better than the rest. Only one man stands up against Loki.
As in most movies, only a few are willing to stand up, leave the safety of numbers, and face the fear, the danger of changing things, making a difference, and doing what’s right.
Life is not the movies. But if we want to be in a movie, let’s act like we are the hero in our own movie. Maturing is not only about accepting the way things are, but accepting your responsibility over them. Each of us lives in his own world, and makes his own decisions, but those decisions contribute to the sum of worlds from all the humans around him.
Loki is everywhere: The criticism without encouragement. The norm that keeps you safe and distracted from improving anything. The fear of the unknown. The culture that keeps us investing in irresponsible corporations and choosing leaders who encourage their existence.
There is no select few who can be superheroes.
Superheroes are just people who show up and do the right thing, for themselves and for the world they live in.
And it’s time we stand up to the Lokis in the world.
Who are you voting for?
Filed under: Accountability, apathy, change, Community power, empowerment, fear, leadership | Tags: awareness, election, mindful, Obama, president, Romney, third party, vote, vote for change
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When someone speaks reasonably about unreasonable things, they are either a genius, or a madman. Cast your vote carefully. If a person talks about spending money they don’t have, putting value in something that has no inherent value, taking away your liberties to fight an unseen enemy to protect your liberties, find another person to vote for. Gridlock ends when we elect people, from president to state rep, who will do the right thing, not follow what was done before because that’s the way things were always done.
Remember: There are many who are thinking just as you are.
Laws may fail us, but our morality will not
Filed under: Accountability, apathy, change, Character, government, leadership, Uncategorized | Tags: Apathy, change, Democrats, government, Obama, Presidential election, regulation, Republicans, Romney, third party, wall street banks
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When government representatives allow immoral but technically legal corporate practices, are we being just as immoral in re-electing those same representatives back into office? Does more regulation help our moral standards or just focus on legal standards? Does it matter? Why do we need legal standards when the moral thing to do is not give our business to those who are doing wrong with our money?
The government announced that starting this month, they will be buying $40 billion worth of near worthless bonds from the Wall St banks every month to try to save the economy. Using our money.
Think it will work?
Willing to bet your retirement on it?
Because if you have a 401k, you already are.
Your strength is needed. Now…more than ever.
Filed under: Accountability, apathy, change, Character, Community power, empowerment, friendship, government, Happiness, Independence, leadership, Relationships, Uncategorized | Tags: Accountability, Central banking, classical liberalism, community power, empowerment, happiness, libertarian, liberty, Obama, Obamacare, personal choice, Presidential election, presidential race 2012, Romney
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Some people think they know better than others. You know the type. They give advice on everything. They believe they have the system of do’s and don’ts that will work. They want what is best for you. And they believe they know what the best thing for you to do is. In fact, they think they know what is best for everyone.
Others believe it’s better for people to make their own choice. They believe people will strive, work, share, and care for others. Not because we’re forced to, but because in a stable system of laws, that is what we will do. They believe people should have the freedom to live how they want, but without hurting others. To choose what passion to follow, where to work, how much to pay, how much to get paid, what to buy, how to explore their own consciousness, and who to congregate with.
There are those who want a system of control because they want to protect people, not just from others, but protect them from making the wrong choices. They want to protect us from ourselves. They are cautious of people. Do they even trust people?
They like giving guidelines, and providing a program. They believe in a high standard of living, and they want everyone to have that standard, not just the opportunity for that standard, because they think everyone deserves it. And they will engineer a system using their formula of mandates that will get you this, regardless of how this effects the financial condition of the country. They will make it too affordable to pass up or they will cook it into the system so you have no choice.
These people truly want to help others.
And they believe they are the expert authority on that. And they believe in a central authority. Like a central bank that controls money, or a central insurance company that controls health care, or a central department of energy and agriculture to provide corporate welfare. Or a police authority that has taken our right to trial, so we can be arrested without charge.
Those who believe in people are different. They are courageous, because living an empowered life is damn scary. But that is why we are here. Not to make a perfect world, but to accept that life is not going to be perfect, and anything that is worth doing in life is risky. And caring about someone else is not about giving them something. It’s about being their friend and helping them face to face, not through a check delivered by a service taken from our paycheck.
We’re here to make choices, not have someone else make them for us.
We’re here to get hurt, mend, learn, and grow. And when we see someone else hurting, we’re here to extend our own hand and help them up. Not pay others to help them for us. Because people need to intimately know they are valued before they can do something of value. And because you cannot make someone care about you by forcing them to share with you.
We’re here to explore our passions and our own consciousness without being restricted on what we can do, unless it hurts another person.
We know that we cannot get as far alone as we can by joining others, but not in faceless networks. We’re here to share life in a community, because we must have the opportunity to learn that without guidelines or incentives, a rich life is one of honest collaboration with others.
We know that if we give leaders the authority to do things on behalf of us, we must remain aware of how they are using this power. And that we must stop them when we feel they are doing a disservice to us.
We know that we should treat everyone else how we would want to be treated. And so we act accordingly.
These people trust humanity to do the right thing.
Some might call these libertarian values.
But they are not.
They are called human values.
And I believe it is how we should live.
How bizarre, how bizarre
Filed under: Accountability, change, government, Trust | Tags: Debates, Dodd-Frank, government, Obama, Romney, tax breaks for shipping jobs overseas
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Last night, Romney was criticizing a law that doesn’t really exist, and Obama was talking about doing something that he said he would do when he ran for office the last time.
Romney said that the Dodd-Frank Act “designates a number of banks as too big to fail, and they’re effectively guaranteed by the federal government.”
But most of the Act is unenforced, since regulators don’t know how the Wall Street banks make-up what they sell. Bernie Frank (Democrat) even said that since regulators have not defined what a qualified mortgage is, the policy “has no effect” on loans now, which “will not be covered by this.”
And Obama talked about preventing loopholes and tax breaks for businesses shipping jobs overseas, and what has been done about that in 4 years? Will Romney be able to change any of this?
How bizarre.
Why do we continue to vote for these parties?
Let’s make the change.
How to make your vote count
Filed under: Accountability, apathy, change, Character, Community power, empowerment, Happiness, Independence, leadership | Tags: Apathy, community power, don't throw your vote away, election 2012, empowerment, ignorance, Obama, president, Romney, third party, vote
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Many feel that money influences our representatives.
Many believe that elections are decided by money rather than votes. I think this is correct, but only in so much as we believe that is true and willingly throw our vote away or not vote. I know this because I was one of those who felt helpless and didn’t bother voting.
I was helping to creating an environment of hopelessness. An environment that promoted the idea that our neighbors are ignorant, dumb, and lazy. Then I realized something important. With this attitude, we will never elect any real change into office. We will think our personal vote doesn’t matter because it will be diluted by the mass of humanity who isn’t paying attention.
But I was wrong. I was more than wrong, in fact. I was part of the problem!
As much as people are focused on themselves and their wants and their opinions, they are also influneced by their environment. In fact, studies have shown if a person is given a test with an obvious answer, they will change their answer to the wrong one when they are put into a group of people who provide that wrong answer!
It is indeed true, if you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem. Devalue your vote and your fellow citizen’s capacity to do the right thing, and after a time, you will find that that is precisely the environment you live in.
Value that vote. Ask others how they’re voting. And why.
In Egypt (and Syria, and Tunisia, and Bahrain) people are rioting against military police because they don’t want to be told what to do by a dictator. They are being arrested without trial by secret police and being tortured because they want the right to vote.
Don’t throw your vote away.
The question to ask yourself is: What are the most important issues? And are the Democrats or Republicans addressing these issues, or avoiding them?
Remember, the power is still with us.
The secret to truly changing yourself
Filed under: accepting imperfection, Accountability, change, Character, empowerment, Happiness, Independence, Mastery, productivity, Taoism | Tags: body dysmorphic, character, evolution, happiness, independence, self-awareness
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When I was in middle school, I noticed that I was smaller than most of the other kids. And I hated that. I hated my skinny arms and legs. So I started lifting weights. And eating… and taking supplements. I got bigger, but I always found fault. Even throughout college, I compared myself to other guys.
For years, I forced myself into this lifestyle until it became a habit… until one year. I stopped working out. I had met someone, the first person who showed care for me. We moved in together. I soon realized that I had never been training for me. Now, years later, I exercise for myself, for the good feelings I get. And I focus on getting fit, not big.
Changing something in your life means taking control. And where does that control come from? Your personality, values…your attitude, right?
So the first step in changing our actions is finding out what values are driving them. Is it because we’re unhappy with ourselves? Because no matter how much you “improve”, you will never become happy with yourself if you’re not already content with life.
Once you gain this self-awareness, then whatever changes you want to make aren’t hard, because…well…because you want them. When my goal changed from getting validation to being fit, it was almost unconscious. I didn’t obsess over becoming healthy. I didn’t hold myself to a strict program. I didn’t read books about why it was better to be more fit. I didn’t do those things because I didn’t need to do those things.
A measure of the value of a goal is how much you want to do the grunt work. But if the drive to change comes from inside you, you will embrace the grind and it will cease to be one. Facing the challenge of something new will become exciting, not paralyzing. The sacrifice won’t feel like a sacrifice.
But it won’t really work if you’re doing it because you think you must or you have no choice. You can’t do it if fear is driving you, or if you’re forced to.
People do change. We evolve. Just don’t force it. Evolution is natural. Other people and your environment can supplement a change in your values, but the truest values, the ones that drive us to do the right thing, always come from the inside.
So what’s the secret to really changing yourself?
Let go of what you think you need.
Free yourself. Because no one else will.
We were meant to evolve. And we have the self-awareness and freewill to do exactly that.
You are more important than you think
Filed under: Accountability, change, Community power, Consumer power, Uncategorized | Tags: Citi bank, market crash, mortgage bonds, wall street banks
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“How can I help you?”
“I was calling to close my Citi accounts.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. And why are you wanting to close your account?”
“Well, after I’ve been reading about the part that Citi played in buying and selling mortgage bond derivatives, going into huge debt, which caused the market to collapse, I feel that I can’t do business with them.”
“Uh. Ok. So you’re closing your bank account because of the mortgage bond derivatives or whatever?”
“Yes.”
“Ok.”
Silence.
“You know, back in 2008 the market crashed-”
“Oh, I know. I’ve been an account specialist for 10 years.”
“Ok”
“So you’re closing your Citi account? Are you not having a bank account anymore…?”
“I’m closing all my Wall St bank accounts. And keeping my accounts with my local bank.”
“Ok. Well, I can’t turn back the clock, unfortunately. It looks like you had a lot of activity on your accounts.”
“Yes.”
“So 4 years later you’re closing your account..”
“Yes, I would’ve done it sooner, but I didn’t know things would turn out like they did.”
“Well, I can’t speak to the actions of the bank, but restitution has been made and we’ve moved ahead.”
“I don’t think it has. The US market collapsed, and, you know, there’s blame to go around, but I think the banks need to face the consequence of their actions.”
The best part about living in a free society is that if someone does wrong, we don’t have to work for them if we don’t want to. We can quit. Or if there is someone who works for us and they do wrong? We can fire them if the government won’t do it.
The government, of course, encouraged the banks to give out mortgages by providing them the money, which led to homes being overvalued, and people getting homes who wouldn’t have been given mortgages before, but then defaulting on their payments.
But the bankers made the bad loans, and the Wall St banks deceptively packaged the bad loans with the good and sold them with good ratings, so it feels right that I fired all the Wall Street bankers that were working for me. Given, I’m still part of the system. And my money is still coming from a corporation, since I work for one. But it’s not coming from the most carelessly powerful corporations of all. The ones that the government is allowing to exist in the same too-big-to-fail capacity that they were in before the crash of 2008. Apparently, these banks should be called too-big-to-control.
But I controlled my business with them. And if we all do that, and make it known we will not stand for such clear carelessness and deceit, and we will not have our bank accounts, 401k’s, or credit cards with them, then I think the banks will be controlled. And they will be controlled in the best way possible:
By the customers who they have wronged and who must pay for their bailout.
And that’s you and me.
Engage. You don’t need to be an expert.
Filed under: Accountability, apathy, change, Community power, leadership, TED talk, Uncategorized | Tags: Accountability, Apathy, civic duty, communication, community power, conversation, engagement, Meslin, partisanship, politics, TED talk
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Do we talk to other people about what we’re doing? About what they’re doing? Do we ask why we do what we do..buy what we buy, bank who we bank with..eat what we eat..send our kids to the schools that we send them to, fund the wars that kill for goals we support? Do we not only talk, but do we listen to what they’re saying…and even more importantly, think about what they really mean?
Are we trying to be members of a community, or do we see everyone as doing their own thing, a zero sum game, as passengers on a ship out of our control? Or do we see ourselves as part of it, as responsible for it, unafraid of facing the problems of our society?
Why we don’t do these things is addressed by Meslin. He says: “As long as we believe that people, our own neighbors, are selfish, stupid or lazy, then there’s no hope.” We must recognize this, because it is the collective that is going to change things. And once we accept this, we must have a conversation.
Politics isn’t a bad word unless you’re using it to win an argument, or give yourself an identity. Politics, in fact, is probably the most important thing to talk about right now. Not partisanship…but politics. There’s only one thing more important, and that’s figuring out that you belong in the conversation because you’re not an island onto yourself. That’s what Obama meant, but couldn’t really express.
We’re not different than anyone else, regardless of what they’re doing out there. The guy between jobs, the CEO, or the small businessperson. We have the opportunity to decide because people believed so much in the idea that we’re all equal, that they were willing to die for a system that could give us the power to decide…and it DID give ALL OF US the power to decide. And we must decide, or else the institutions, corporate and government, they will do it for us. And I think these institutions have gotten too big to handle our needs. It’s up to us to start this conversation.
Now, it’s up to us.
